My cat, Manganese, has incredibly poor couch etiquette.  Not only that, I think that I can prove this in ANY Court of Law!!!

Examine these actual photographs, taken from a hidden camera.  (The camera was hidden in a light fixture in the ceiling.)
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    | |_______________|
    | | __       __  |
    | |   \     /    |
    | |    \   /     |
    | |\ /  \ /      |
    | | |    |       |
    | |/|\   |       |
    | | O    |       |
    | |  |   |    |  |
    | |   \  |   /   |
    | |    \_|__/    |
    | |     _|_      |
    | |    / - \     |
    | |    | ..|     |
    | |     \_/      |
    | |______________|_
    |_|_______________|

        EXHIBIT A

Exhibit A shows the Plaintiff, (ME) and the Defendant (Manganese, the Cat) in a RARE instance of couch harmony.

Both are aligned along the long (vertical) axis of the couch.  Both can stretch out.

This photograph was taken at 7:55 p.m., while both subjects were preparing to watch the Drew Carey show.

Now, let us look at another photograph, taken just a few minutes later...

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    | |_______________|
    | |      __      |__
    | |        \     /
    | |  \  /   \   /|
    | | O-----   \ / |
    | |  /  \    /   |
    | |         /    |
    | |        /     |
    | |  |     |  |  |
    | |   \   /  /   |
    | |    \_|__/    |
    | |     _|_      |
    | |    / - \     |
    | |    | ..|     |
    | |     \_/      |
    | |______________|_
    |_|_______________|
 
        EXHIBIT B

Looking closely at Exhibit B, one can CLEARLY SEE that the Defendant (Cat) has moved into a HORIZONTAL ASPECT with relation to the couch, in contrast to the PRIOR VERTICAL ASPECT ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! !

[Also notice the Defendant (Cat) now pretends no interest in the Drew Carey show; in fact, the Defendant (Cat) NOW faces TOWARDS the couch back and AWAY from the television viewing area!!!!]

Notice how this has twisted the Plaintiff's (My) spinal column and hips into a totally unnatural position, creating  the potential for SEVERE SPINAL ABNORMALITIES ! ! ! !

A secondary effect of this INJURIOUS action by the defendant (Cat) is that in order for the Plaintiff (Me) to lay on his back and at the same time to watch the Drew Carey show, he must now twist his neck to an extraordinary degree, because of the stupendous spinal dislocations caused by the Defendant's (Cat's) horizontal attitude, versus it's prior vertical attitude.

Additional damages COULD be awarded due to the Plaintiff's (My) Right Foot being forced off the couch, and possibly even being displaced from its initial position of being UNDERNEATH THE BLANKET to a position of being TOTALLY UNCOVERED!!!!!

This egregious behavior by the Defendant (Cat) continues despite repeated efforts of the Plaintiff (Me) at re-positioning the Defendant (Cat) into the mutually beneficial VERTICAL ASPECT vs. the detrimental HORIZONTAL ASPECT.

The VERTICAL RE-POSITIONING of the Defendant (Cat) rarely lasts longer than a five-minute period.

Clearly, ownership of the couch is the main issue here.

The Plaintiff's (My) case is based on actual receipts for the purchase and ownership of the couch.

The Defendants (Cat's) defense is, "The couch is MINE."

Please respond in this forum, or directly to:
stephencapps@worldnet.att.net